FranklinCovey Consultant Blogs | Kory Kogon | February, 2009
I was teaching a Leading At The Speed of Trust class last week…and lunchtime I did battle with a new credit card company. I am an online banking/paying person; I pay my card off each and every month. But something was wrong…I had a balance!!! So I was on their site and was disgusted as I thought they were scamming me….not showing me my whole balance…..just what they wanted me to see to earn more interest. My New York distrust and paranoia came to bear….
I shared my situation with the class as to why the world could no longer be trusted!!!! It’s companies like this one that make it bad for everyone….etc….
My family, from cold New York, descended on our home in sunny Tucson, AZ for a few days in February. It is a once-a-year tradition…there’s about 7-8 members involved, finding a place to sleep anywhere in the house. My parents come, they are in their 80’s and terrific dancers. My father still runs his small business. They just celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary.
My mom now suffers from dementia. Every time I see her, a little more of her disappears. She is physically in great shape…but struggles to tell her three daughters apart.
Here’s what I know: I am able to sleep at night knowing I am putting the big rocks…the MOST important things first. My parents and I speak a couple times per week; the last few years I have made sure we see other a few times a year and everyday I keep learning that it is unacceptable to not identify and put the most important things first.
Whether it is your team, your peers, your family….don’t let the small rocks fool you. Don’t let your ego overwhelm you…take the time to consider your values and the “most important”. Don’t let the urgency of the day to day cause you to regret later on…If you need help with figuring this out….take a Focus: Achieving Your Highest Priorities class….that may be just the “big rock” you need to come to terms with what’s important in your life.
Keep your eye on the biggest rocks. Don’t live to regret it later.
As a training consultant for FranklinCovey, I use myself as a “lab rat” for implementing the lessons, whether from the The Speed of Trust, The 7 Habits, Focus or Great Leaders. This is the best way for me to be a model of effectiveness as an individual, a team member and a leader to achieve great results personally and professionally. But it also allows me to practice the pain of getting there. Being human is such a great part of learning and I so respect my unconscious self doing what it wants to do unless I consciously decide I am going to do something differently. I can be a great victim, I can be quite disorganized if I am not careful….and with my New York background…I can be highly reactive. Takes a lot of work for me to stop those behaviors and do something different and what I know to be right.
Here’s one I’m grappling with now….
In this unbelievable economic time, my toughest and greatest challenge is to remember Stephen Covey’s teachings around Habit 1, Be Proactive. I can (and do sometimes) remain awake at night, worrying about the economy, my job, and every other demon that we all know creeps in at 3 a.m…..and then I think about what I help people do everyday….STAY OUT OF THE CIRCLE OF CONCERN….and then I consciously work to focus on my CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE…..what can I do everyday to make my way through the chaos…that which I have control over…. The more energy I put into what I can impact…the better I feel and sleep and the better rewards the very next day.
So…it ain’t easy….but if you want to truly be effective…even just a little, in good times or bad…..force your “conscious discipline” of moving the demons out, and focus on what you can do something about. So get some sleep.